In Recognition of National Suicide Prevention Month- “Sis, We Need You… Please Don’t Go” – Why Therapy Matters When Suicide Isn’t an Option
By Dr. Ifeanyi Ufondu, Clinical Psychologist
Founder, BroKin.Org | Coming Spring 2026: WoKin.Org
Sis,
I need you to hear me today. All my life, I’ve heard the phrase: “Black folks don’t commit suicide.” Maybe you’ve heard it too. It’s whispered in church basements, passed around in family kitchens, and repeated like gospel in our neighborhoods. The belief is rooted in strength: that our resilience as Black and Brown people—after slavery, after Jim Crow, after systemic oppression—keeps us from breaking.
But let’s be real: that’s a myth.
And it’s a dangerous one.
The truth is, suicide among Black women is no longer an unspoken rarity. Recent studies show the rates are rising steadily every year (Bridge et al., 2019; Walker, 2022). The stigma has kept too many of us silent, making us feel like even thinking about suicide is a betrayal of our culture.
Why We Don’t Talk About It
Historically, our survival as a people depended on resilience. In Ayan culture and many African traditions, life is sacred; taking one’s life was seen as dishonor. In the Black church, suicide has long been labeled a sin, a choice that separates you from God. In our families, it was brushed under the rug, with whispers of “She was sick” or “He couldn’t handle it.”
That silence was meant to protect us. But now, Sis, that silence is hurting us.
Why It’s Rising Now
Black women are the backbone of families, movements, and ministries—but that also means you’re carrying more than most. Between racism, sexism, poverty, single motherhood, domestic violence, microaggressions at work, and trauma passed down through generations, the weight is unbearable. And instead of being told “It’s okay to get help”, you’re told:
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“Pray it away.”
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“Don’t tell our business.”
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“You’re stronger than this.”
Strength is beautiful, Sis, but strength without support breaks bones.
Faith + Therapy: Breaking the Taboo
I’ll never tell you not to pray. Faith has carried us farther than we ever should have made it. But even scripture says “faith without works is dead.” Prayer without therapy leaves gaps.
Dr. Thema Bryant, a Black psychologist and minister, says it best: “You are not weak for needing help; you are human.”Therapy isn’t betrayal of culture or faith—it’s continuation of it. It’s reclaiming your birthright to wholeness.
Rev. Dr. Renita Weems, a Black woman theologian, puts it this way: “God is not afraid of your sadness. God is present in your process.”
Sis, therapy is not weakness—it’s survival.
Dr. Ufondu’s Guide to Self-Worth and Discovery When Suicide Isn’t an Option
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Say out loud: “I deserve to be here.”
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Remember that “strong Black woman” doesn’t mean “unbreakable Black woman.”
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Let yourself cry—it’s healing, not weakness.
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Create space where you don’t have to carry everyone else.
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Limit toxic conversations, even if it means saying no to family.
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Write a letter to your younger self—remind her she made it.
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Replace “I should be stronger” with “I deserve help.”
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Find therapy—culturally competent, faith-informed if you need it.
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Journal your pain so it doesn’t stay buried in your body.
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Keep a survival list: people, places, dreams worth staying for.
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Rest without apology. Rest is revolutionary.
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Find sister circles or groups that uplift, not shame.
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Pray, meditate, and breathe—but also plan your healing.
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Use affirmations: “Suicide is not my story.”
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Take breaks from social media comparison traps.
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Nourish your body—your temple deserves care.
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Call one safe person when your thoughts get heavy.
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Choose joy in small doses, daily.
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Hold onto hope: tomorrow can look different.
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Reach for life, not silence.
The Future: WoKin.Org
As the founder of BroKin.Org, I’ve dedicated my work to Black and Latino men. But Sis, I see you too. That’s why in Spring 2026, I will launch WoKin.Org—Mental Health Solutions for Women of Color.
This will be a sister company designed specifically for you: Black and Brown women who deserve therapy, community, and healing that feels like home. Dr. Ufondu has also decided to collaborate with Dallas/Ft. Worth and Tyler, TX based non-profit(501c) ULTIMATE FAMILY OUTREACH founder Marilyn Pettigrew, to blend both organizations to create a greater reach for women of color in crisis.
Sis, Please Stay
I know it’s heavy. I know you’re tired. But I also know this: your story isn’t over. Suicide is not your option—healing is.
You are not invisible. You are not alone. You are not too broken to be whole again.
We need you, Sis. Please don’t go.
If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts, call or text 310-590-5898 for immediate support.
